Begin forwarded message:
This is Alan next door. I’m sorry buddy, but I have a confession to make to you. I’ve been riddled with guilt these past few months and have been trying to pluck up the courage to tell you to your face, but I am at least now telling in text as I can’t live with myself a moment longer without you knowing. The truth is, I have been sharing your wife, day and night when you’re not around. In fact, probably more than you, particularly in the mornings after you’ve left for work. I haven’t been getting it at home recently, but that’s no excuse I know. The temptation was just too much … I can no longer live with the guilt and I hope you will accept my sincerest apologies and forgive me. I promise that it won’t happen again.
Bob, feeling anguished and betrayed, immediately goes into his bedroom, grabs his gun, and without a word, shoots his wife, killing her instantly. He returns to the lounge where he pours himself a stiff drink and shakily sits down on the sofa. He takes out his phone to respond to the neighbor’s text when he notices he has another message:
This is Alan next door again. Sorry about the slight typo on my last text. I expect you worked it out anyway, but as I’m sure you’ve noticed, my spell checker changed ‘WiFi’ to ‘Wife’. Technology hey? Hope you saw the funny side of that.